tess at 11 months...

tess is 11 months today

11 month old tess is going through so many changes. i think she can sense how much herself because suddenly she is nursing like a newborn again. she is extra cuddly when she is not busy exploring the world away from me. she alternates between needing me right there and wanting to do it herself! she has started to take her first tentative steps on her own and likes to make a big production out of it, throwing her arms in the air dramatically before she tries. we all cheer like mad and she loves it. she is so serious about everything but genuinely goofy at heart, which makes everything she does even funnier. she points at what she wants and points to herself and screams "ahhhhhhhhh" until you give it to her. if you don't? watch out, she likes to throw herself on the ground and scream or possibly bite you for it! she will then give you kisses and hugs to say sorry. she is getting so good at communicating even with her few words. new words include... dog, cat, up, yeah, nini (night night), niiiiiii (noooo!) and of course the names of all her beloved family. i can't believe all the changes, and i can't wait to see what the next month brings. it's been a wonderful, challenging, terrific almost year so far!

some more of tess from recent weeks....

june is aps awareness month...

many people aren't aware of what aps or antiphospholipid antibody syndrome is. i certainly wasn't until i was told i had it. after my first son was stillborn i was told i would probably never have an answer, that it was just "one of those things" that sometimes happens. sadly, many women never find an answer for the loss of a baby ,but more and more many late term losses or multiple miscarriages can sometimes be explained (some dr.'s believe aps can be attributed to 25% of these cases). i was tested for numerous possibilities and it was found i have aps, an autoimmune disorder that effects the blood. specifically, my body recognizes the placenta as something foreign and attacks it by causing clots which cuts off nutrients to the baby. it also causes an increase in complications like preeclampsia, which i had with my third baby. aps was discovered fairly recently, and treatment for it even more recently. if my mother had a had it it there is a good chance i would not be here. i wish i had known i had it before pregnancy, and i'm sad that i had to lose a baby to find out i did. i'm so grateful that i do know and that i can be treated. i have gone on to have three more beautiful children because of that. aps also effects a lot of people, men included, outside of pregnancy. it makes you at a much greater risk for blood clots, pulmonary embolisms, heart attacks and strokes. since it can be such a serious illness, and since losing my son because of it i want to be a part of spreading awareness about this disorder. if you would like to find out more, you can visit www.apsfa.org.

memorial day...

happy memorial day, happy beginning of summer! i hope you are hanging out in the backyard (or front yard, or park, or pool) on a big old blanket like we are. enjoy it, it goes so fast!

market season...

yay for farmer's market season! i'm so excited to start our weekly ritual of visiting the market as a family. fresh produce, meeting friends, climbing trees, eating popcicles, hanging out on a blanket in the grass... it feels like summer! after a the first few weeks were rainy, it was nice to have a lovely day. here are a few photos of sid with her  good friend who came along. photos with tessa were taken by my sister katy, with much thanks! 

katy and i will be at the market selling our wares a few times this season. life is so busy with three kids but it is fun to do! maybe we will see you there!

tess at ten months...

tess at ten months is a super silly tess! she scrunches her nose to show good and bad. she is very good at letting you know exactly what she wants, often with her own made up signs or language. she is cruising all over the place, by herself and holding our hands. she can stand on he own but is still unsure about the whole walking thing. it's getting so close. i'm not sure i'm ready for that milestone but i am enjoying this steadier tess, as it means she can explore more freely on her own. she is constantly watching her brother and sister and trying to do what they do. she loves being outside, animals (especially her nap buddy, kitty). she loves the zoo and exploring in general. she saw the ocean for the first time and held our hands to run into the water as fast as her legs would carry her. she kicked and splashed and was covered in sand and water. she licked all the seashells like an ice cream cone then threw them down for another. she is fairly fearless until someone new approaches and then she suddenly is shy and cuddly. she says "hi" and "bye" and waves at everything. she gives great big open mouth kisses while smashing her face into yours. she is loved tremendously and that love just shines out of her onto us all. we are all so grateful for this little ball of light!

sorry, for my absence lately! my five days a week posting challenge was fun but proved to hard to keep up. i'm going to aim for two days a week. i do have a lot to share!

**i do post pictures daily on instagram!

mister finch...

years ago i had the idea to make large fabric moths to hang on the wall. i thought it would be such a  beautiful sight. i doubted anyone else would like them but me. small children got in the way of making what i had in mind, it would require both intricate and large scale work. i always carried the idea around with me though. when i saw these moths by mister finch i literally gasped! they are different than the moths i envisioned but nonetheless someone had created large scale textile moths! i'm glad someone else had the idea too and actually carried out. i'm glad to have found the work of mister finch as well. if you are a fan of textile art, especially nature inspired, you have probably seen his work before. we live extraordinarily different lives i guess, but in way when i see someone creating work like this i feel like i have found a kindred spirit. i also feel the tiniest bit jealous of their free time to create. someday all these ideas rattling around my brain will have more time to be developed. in the meantime i will fit in what i can when i can, and i will be inspired to make more time by looking at marvelous creations like these....

he writes:

My main inspirations come from nature and often I return to certain ideas again and again.
Flowers, insects and birds really fascinate me with their amazing life cycles and extraordinary nests and behaviour.
British folklore is also so beautifully rich in fabulous stories and warnings and never ceases to be at the heart of what I make.
Shape shifting witches, moon gazing hares and a smartly dressed devil ready to invite you to stray from the path.
Humanising animals with shoes and clothes is something Ive always done and I imagine them to come alive at night. Getting dressed and helping an elderly shoemaker or the tired housewife.

how lovely.

all photos and more are from here. hopefully he doesn't mind me sharing them. you can also look in his etsy shop as well.

forever...

the other day i was out walking with the kids (we do that a lot these days, forever wandering) and my son suddenly turned to me and said "i wish we could all stay this same age forever... us kids and you and papa, and we could just stay together like this always." he said it with such absolute longing and honesty. it was a one of those moments you want to hold inside you forever and never forget. i want to memorize it and keep it with me throughout my life, to wear it like a locket next to my heart. i know that feeling and often i wish for it too... but they will continue to grow and change, as children do. honestly as sad as that makes me at times, i of course can't wait to see it. i want to know the people they will become because they are already so interesting and funny. even tessa already at nine months old. i love who they are and i will love who they become even more. my son's words are what i need though. they are a reminder of how fleeting it all really is. he can feel it now. at ten he can sense that cusp he is on and i'm glad he is trying to hold onto childhood a bit longer. although, a few minutes later he did say that maybe he would like to be thirteen at least, that way he could watch all those PG-13 movies we never let him see. oh, the future is always calling isn't it?

the goat farm...

saturday morning i went with my sister to the revival of vintage market at the goat farm arts center. the goat farm is one of my favorite places to visit. it is sort of indescribable... beautiful crumbling old buildings and factory spaces that are used now as a performance place for music, art, and dance. artists live and work here as well... as do goats and chickens! it is so quintessentially atlanta, one of the best things about this city. the market was a lot of fun. i picked up a few vintage pieces, including this beautiful rocking chair for the porch. it was only $10 dollars and needs only a little bit of love! it's the beginning of "the fixing up the porch project" we are starting after i have a yard sale next weekend (and get rid of all the crap i have been piling up on the porch for it). i'm hoping to find some more vintage pieces to go with it. i saw a beautiful old vintage wicker rocker last year at kudzu but didn't have any spare money at the time to get it. hopefully some more pieces will find their way to me though! next time i visit the goat farm i will be sure to bring along my real camera and take some more photos to share.

spring "break"...

oh, nine months. i can't tell you the number of things i have pulled out of the baby's mouth this week (including brick, why?), pulled her off of or had to take away from her. she's already figured out how to climb... dishwasher, stairs, and working on the couch and chairs. busy, busy, busy! she has a whole world to explore and try to eat!

this week had been our "spring break". i put that in quotes because it is not much different than most other weeks. it has been really warm though, so we were basically living on a blanket in the grass this week. jack henry is exploring his independence and biking all over our neighborhood. i am wishing that it was more like my childhood with more kids out and about too. we make play dates but that's  really not the same. is it different where you live? sidney has been exploring the neighborhood too but she is our little ambassador. she likes to talk to all of the grownups on the street... helping a mom with a toddler a few doors down and gardening with the woman across from us. she likes to know what everyone is doing and what is going on. the pollen is insane here. every spring it rains down on us and covers the world in a green haze that is impossible to get off. i've never seen anything like it until moving here. last night it rained though (which sounds so great on the metal roof) and hopefully much of it was washed away. i have three sick kids now so i'm not sure how much exploring they will feel up too. maybe once it dries out a bit we will pull out the blanket again and sit in the grass watching the baby eat sticks to her hearts content. happy spring!

nine months...

tess is nine months old. she has now been out in the world longer than she was in the womb. that is so bittersweet. i find myself looking enviously at pregnant women on the street. how quickly you forget how hard it was! little tess looks so happy here, but you can probably see her runny nose. she's had a bad cold this week. yet, still she smiles on. that's tess. until you make her mad, and then uh oh she throws a tantrum. sidney on my lap? she is jealous and throws her head back in anger banging it on the floorand needing all my attention. take away something she wants and she throws her head back again or falls forward onto her tummy where she kicks and screams. she loves being naughty! she finds something new and looks to you to see if she is supposed to have it... no? even better!! she is so full of energy and is always on the move. i held her in my lap today like when she was a newborn and asked her to be my little baby again, to just lay there and look around and be content. but no, she wiggles and laughs and squirms away. even singing her favorite songs only gives you a minute. if you sit on the floor though, she is likely to come over and climb all over you like a jungle gym. she will offer you some snack, and then snatch it away again. she will laugh and dance. she sometimes lets go and stands on her own, but only when she doesn't realize. she is not so quick to walk like her brother was and i am grateful. stay my little baby tess. let me cuddle you and kiss your cheeks and belly. let me nurse you sometimes with out squirming around but the way you used to, staring at me only and not the goings on of the world around us. when those moments do come now i must remember to treasure them completely. don't let me miss them before they are gone all together.


sorry for my absence last week. a hot water pipe broke in our upstairs bathroom and made quite a mess. we are left without a shower and have only the old claw foot tub to share. all of the pipes need to be replaced up there. anyone want to be our benefactor to make that happen? no? oh, well. the claw foot tub is kind of romantic. at least i keep telling myself that. if you do happen to work for this old house feel free to contact me!